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Voice of Professional Wrestling (Amped 8-2-17)

August 4, 2017

 

Congratulations, fuzzy teeth! You’re reading the best recap of the best independent weekly show in professional wrestling today! No faffing about now. Let’s get right to the action!

 

We kicked things off with a Rockin’ Robin Tournament contest between “Everybody’s Homie” Pompano Joe and “Trigger” Trey Miguel (AKA “The Righteous One” Lisa Coleman). A classic matchup of youth versus experience, this match was a heated competition. Although Joe surprised Trey with speed and dexterity, a Loaded Clip would bring Miguel victory. Despite Miguel’s identity crisis, he stands at the top of the rankings with a record of 3-0. Meanwhile, Pompano drops to J0e-3.

 

Our second match pitted Rockstar Pro Tag Team Champions Night Ryderz (Dustin Rayz & Alex Colon) against the first time pairing of “The Pitbull” Ganger and Wrestling Revolver’s Open Invite Scramble Champion Jordan Len-X in a non-title contest. As one might imagine with these four, it was a hard-hitting and brutal affair. The referee had a difficult time keeping up with all of the tags and double-team attacks, and Night Ryderz took advantage of every opportunity. A Ride of Death for Ganger brought an end to this battle and another victory for our Tag Champs.

 

Next up, we had more tournament action between “The Baddest Man Alive” Aaron Williams and “Lost Girl” Samantha Heights. Those expecting a quick knockout blow from Williams were sorely disappointed, as Heights would not back down from “The BMA.” The two would put on a clinic when it comes to contrasting styles. In the end, however, Williams would defeat Heights with a devastating Cradle Piledriver. While Heights falls to 1-2, Williams joins Miguel at the top with a record of 3-0.

 

The entire Rockstar Nation was disappointed to hear Mikael’s theme song as he approached the ring. Fortunately, Rockstar Pro World Champion “Juggernaut” Jeremiah beat the hell out of him before his match could even begin. Jeremiah grabbed a mic to remind the entire wrestling world of his dominance. He continues to ask the Nation a simple question with an intriguing answer, “Do you want to see something?” When he faces Rey Fenix in round one of The F’n Catalina Wrestling Mixer they’re definitely going to see something.

 

My bro who is too swole to control Clayton “Gainz” Jackson faced Nate Wings in another Rockin’ Robin Tournament matchup. This one was pure power versus speed and agility. Jackson put on a clinic in powerhouse pugilism, but Nate would not stay down. Wings climbed to the top of the turnbuckle and hit a 450 Splash to gain another win in the tournament. Jackson’s record unfortunately drops to 1-2 while Wings earns his first win to join Clay at 1-2.

 

“True Grit” Bruce Grey returned to action after a miraculous recovery from a dislocated shoulder when The Foundation (Bruce Grey & “Street Rat” Sid Fabulous) took on the ludicrous duo of “Dick Sneeze” Jon Murray and “Manscout” Jake Manning. The Foundation worked together like a well-oiled machine against a living joke like Murray and his friend in short pants Manning. The match ended in what Mark Turner called a Jon Murray-style Meltzer Driver. Neither men are young, nor are they bucks! More like an Alvarez Driver. Minus! Five! Stars!

 

The final tournament contest of the night was between “White Trash Messiah” Ron Mathis and “Hot Fiya” Myron Reed. Mathis truly needed a win and didn’t want to join Pompano at the bottom of the pack. Once again Jon Murray decided to interfere in Mathis’ match, and his distraction denied the “White Trash Messiah” another victory. Myron joins Trey and Aaron at the top with a record of 3-0. Unfortunately, Mathis joins Joe at 0-3 in a position that all but strips them of the potential to win the whole tournament.

 

We were treated to a special attraction with The Death Machines (Sami Callihan & Havok) battling the team of “Kinetic” Cole Radrick & “The Dream” Daniel Winchester in a Dayton Street Fight! This one almost immediately spilled out into the Rockstar Nation with steel chairs, trashcans, security staff and more all used as legal weapons. I have to hand it to the two young kids. They can both take a beating! The Death Machines focused their aggressions on Cole, submitting him with a combination Stretch Muffler/Giant Mallet Choke for the win.

 

Our main event was a rematch for the American Luchacore Championship! Champion Maxwell Jacob Friedman faced Zachary Wentz in an absolutely brutal affair. This is the type of match you certainly must subscribe to Rockstarpronetwork.com to see! In the end, MJF locked in the Fujiwara Armbar to secure a submission win over Wentz and retain the American Luchacore Championship! MJF truly is better than you! Unfortunately, Sami Callihan hit the mic after the match to inform Friedman that he was being stripped of the American Luchacore Championship! The title will be retired after the Catalina Wrestling Mixer! In an amazing announcement, Sami declared that the winner of the Mixer will be crowned the final American Luchacore Champion! You gotta be there to see history in the making!

 

Who will be crowned the final American Luchacore Champion at the F’n Catalina Wrestling Mixer? Who will win the Rockin’ Robin Tournament and challenge Jeremiah for the Rockstar Pro World Championship at September’s Smoke ‘Em if You Got ‘Em? Find out at 1106 E. 3rd Street, on FITE.TV, through NU-TV, or by subscribing to Rockstarpronetwork.com! Until next time, I remain your Rockstar Pro color commentator and the Voice of Professional Wrestling.

 

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