Voice of Professional Wrestling (The F'n Catalina Wrestling Mixer 8-4-17)
Welcome back, ploppers and plumpers! The Wrestling Revolver and Rockstar Pro joined forces to bring wrestling fans a truly great iPPV experience. The F’n Catalina Wrestling Mixer has come and gone, and it was easily one of the greatest nights in the history of Rockstar Pro Arena. The final American Luchacore Champion was crowned, as the decade-old title created by OI4K found its ultimate home. Let’s do it to it!
After the opening ceremony and traditional photograph of the tournament entrants, our first matchup was between Shane Strickland and Maxwell Jacob Friedman. The Rockstar Nation truly despised Friedman despite his in-ring prowess. He was determined to soften up Strickland’s arm for the Fujiwara Armbar, but Strickland proved too resourceful for that. After a quick reversal, Strickland locked in the submission known as Swerve Keys to defeat MJF and advance to the semifinals. Poor MJF. To be stripped of the title then defeated in the first round of the tournament to get it back must sting.
Our second tournament match pitted two hosses against one another with “All Ego” Ethan Page going toe-to-toe against Simon Grimm. With so many high-flyers in the tournament, these two represented wrestling’s powerhouses. After agreeing that both combatants hated the movie Step Brothers, the two locked up in combat. It was a very even matchup that came down to who could better exploit his opponent’s mistakes. Grimm locked in a Cross Armbreaker to tapout Page and advance to the semis.
With Matt Tremont out of the tournament with an injury, “The Whole Foxin’ Show” AR Fox faced a mystery opponent in round one of the Mixer. It turned out to be one half of Rockstar Pro Tag Team Champions the Night Ryderz! Alex Colon faced Fox, and both agreed that they wanted a Dayton Street Fight! This was one of the most brutal matches ever held at Rockstar Pro Arena, and in my humble opinion a clear match of the year contender. After fighting throughout the arena and taking out numerous security staff, Fox hit Colon with a 450 Splash through a board and chairs for the pin and the win. Fox would face Grimm in one of our semi-final pairings. Colon may not have progressed in the Mixer, but he gained a lot of new fans and even more respect.
Match four saw Rockstar Pro World Champion “Juggernaut” Jeremiah face one of the world’s greatest luchadores in Rey Fenix. We were all excited for this one, as even JT Davidson admitted that the two men in this contest have hit him the hardest over the course of his managerial career. Jeremiah has proven he kicks harder, wrestles smarter, and even flies higher than most of his competition. He would, however, meet his match in the sensational Fenix. The two went back-and-forth, struggling for an advantage. The high-flying Fenix twisted Jeremiah up like a pretzel to win by submission in our final first round match of The F’n Catalina Wrestling Mixer. Rey would face Strickland in our other semifinal contest.
Our first non-tournament contest of the evening also had title implications. It was the Open Invite Scramble, a signature Wrestling Revolver match that always guarantees madness in the ring. Entrants included Open Invite Scramble Champion Jordan Len-X, Dezmond Xavier, Zachary Wentz, Trey Miguel, Cole Radrick, Space Monkey, Jake Manning, my bro Clayton Jackson, Aaron Williams, Ron Mathis, Myron Reed, Sami Callihan, and Matthew Palmer. Palmer immediately made a lot of enemies by hitting Callihan with a devastating Chop Block before the match even began. This match was pure insanity with competitors jumping off of the stage, flipping off of rafters, and generally beating the hell out of each other. Even “Iron Manager” JT Davidson got involved, delivering a nasty Spinebuster to Mathis before jumping off a turnbuckle into the fray. Ultimately, Palmer was able to lock in a Sharpshooter leg submission on a Callihan who refused to back down. Matt Palmer is your new Wrestling Revolver Open Invite Scramble Champion! He didn’t get to celebrate for long, as Miguel and Wentz and Xavier chased his ass out of the arena. You gotta see this match! It was unquestionably one of the best scrambles I’ve ever seen!
Our first semifinal match of The F’n Catalina Wrestling Mixer pitted Shane Strickland against Rey Fenix. This one was so quick-paced and action-packed, we could barely keep up on commentary. Strickland and Fenix put on the type of clinic wrestling fans would expect from two phenomenal athletes, never slowing down to catch a breath. A bombastic Destroyer brought an end to Strickland’s tournament hopes, but don’t feel too bad for him. He already holds oodles of other titles. The king of luchadores Fenix advanced to the finals!
The other semifinal contest saw 2017 Tournament of Flight winner AR Fox take on newcomer to Rockstar Pro Arena Simon Grimm. In another clash of conflicting styles, these two warriors put on a fascinating display of pro wrestling. Fox has been marveling wrestling audiences for a decade, but Grimm reminded everyone that is no slouch. The two battled back-and-forth for the last spot in the final tournament match. In the end, Fox flattened Grimm with a 450 Splash to advance. “The Whole Foxin’ Show” would face Fenix in our main event for the American Luchacore Championship!
The Battle of the Sexes was our penultimate event with “The Artist” Jake Crist facing “The Havok Death Machine” Jessicka Havok. Intergender wrestling has truly come into its own in the last couple of years, and this was hands-down one of the best intergender match-ups this commentator has ever witnessed. Wether OI4K or Death Machine, it’s all about killing it in the ring. These two combatants did not disappoint. It was Jake’s speed and craftiness against Havok’s raw power. Hell, even Crist’s Work of Art couldn’t keep Havok down. Havok lifted Crist high into the air and pounded him into the mat with an incredible Chokeslam she calls Death from Above for the pinfall victory. What a match!
In a main event for the ages Rey Fenix faced AR Fox to determine who would be the last man ever to hold the American Luchacore Championship. This one was fast and furious and flippy to the extreme. My words can’t do it justice, as this match has to be seen to be believed. At the end of an amazing contest, Fenix nailed Fox with an incredible Fire Thunder Driver to end the match as the final American Luchacore Champion! What a way to end The F’n Catalina Wrestling Mixer, and what a great way to retire such a prestigious title!
I’m still reeling from all the great action at The F’n Catalina Wrestling Mixer! If you weren’t there, you must catch this one on Highspots.com or Rockstarpronetwork.com! When Rockstar Pro and the Wrestling Revolver join forces, nothing can stop us! Until next time, I remain your Rockstar Pro color commentator and the Voice of Professional Wrestling.