Voice of Professional Wrestling (Imma Be a Gangsta Forever 11-3-17)
Welcome to Hell, idiots. Wait a minute. I mean here’s my recap of our amazing November iPPV Imma Be a Gangsta Forever. Who reigned supreme, and who ended up in stitches? Read on to find out!
Our opening contest set a quick pace for the evening when Ace Austin... Shakespeare went head-to-head with Nate Wings. This was the type of match that every wrestling card needs to kick things off: pure high-speed energy! These two athletes engaged in a game of one-upmanship in the early stages of the match before truly going all out. It was a high-flying, strike-exchanging contest that both competitors desperately wanted to win. In the end, Nate showed that Ace still has a bit of a way to go before beating the day one Rockstar Pro original. Wings hit the Casadora Bomb off the top rope for the pinfall win!
Trios action followed when Night Ryderz (Dustin Rayz, Alex Colon & Aaron Williams) took on The Foundation (Sid Fabulous, Pat the Bruiser & Prospect #2). The Foundation looked incredibly strong with their new prospect joining their cause. Prospect #2 may not be as big and strong (or as savvy) as Pat the Bruiser, but I’m sure he has potential. Night Ryderz, however, looked just as dangerous and destructive as ever. Sid and Pat both fought valiantly, but Prospect #2 perhaps got a little too ambitious. As Williams fended off the rest of the trio, Colon and Rayz hit Prospect #2 with the Ride of Death for the 1-2-3. Night Ryderz are undoubtedly already a serious threat in the fight for the new Rockstar Pro Trios Championships.
The “Tattooed Metalhead Pit Bull” Hudson Envy challenged Samantha Heights in Envy’s debut Rockstar Pro contest. Envy attacked Heights seemingly from out of nowhere at Amped, pulling her out of her trios match and fighting into the locker room. It was a brilliant way to get into Sam’s head days before their scheduled meeting. The striking specialist Envy took the fight to Heights immediately with nasty kicks and forearm shots. The two brawled in and out of the ring until Samantha eventually got the upper hand. Heights positioned Envy’s chin on the bottom turnbuckle and ran in for a devastating F Your Face before delivering a flying Bangarang to secure the win! Heights stood tall at the end of the match, but the look in Hudson’s eyes indicated that perhaps she is not yet finished with the “Lost Girl.”
A Dayton Street Fight was up next between “Kinetic” Cole Radrick and “The Legendary” Larry D. It’s insanity that Cole even accepted this match in the first place, as Larry D had been decimating almost every opponent he has faced in the Rockstar Pro ring! To his credit, Radrick hit the ring hot and attacked D without delay. It takes a lot to keep the big man down, as Cole found out when he threw everything he had at Larry D. Larry fought back with deafening chair shots and even picking up and throwing Cole across the arena and splattering him onto the concrete floor. Things got even more brutal as the fight spilled outside into the parking lot. Radrick and D climbed a fence while punching one another. Larry D got the advantage and chucked Radrick through a sheet of plywood before pinning him for the win. Well, Cole, sometimes you get exactly what you ask for.
The next match was a Triple Threat contest between “Professional Dick Slime” Jon Murray, “True Grit” Bruce Grey and “White Trash Messiah” Ron Mathis. There was a lot of history to this one with Bruce and Jon being the first ever Rockstar Pro Tag Team Champions and Bruce and Ron being the closest of friends for the majority of their wrestling careers. DDTs proved ineffective on Bruce, while Murray seemed to injure himself. As Grey and Mathis attacked one another, familiar music rang out. “New Jackass” Jon Murray returned with a shopping cart full of hardcore plunder and wearing a brand new “BIG DADDY RON (and also Jon Murray)” shirt. That changed the complexion of the match so much that Mathis was able to hit Grey with a terrifying Tombstone Piledriver to get the win. Then, Murray shamelessly plugged his new shirt despite Mathis’ objections.
Jeff Cannonball’s H20 Heavyweight Championship was on the line in a great Fatal Four-Way matchup! It was Cannonball defending his title against the backstabbing Clayton “Gainz” Jackson, Donovan Danhausen and Pompano Joe. This one was as hard-hitting as it gets! All four competitors thew themselves at one another in a concerted effort to dethrone the H2O Champion. It went back and forth quite a bit, but in the end the man from H2O proved his toughness. Cannonball rocked Donovan with a Sit-out Piledriver to win the match and keep his title! At least Clay didn’t claim it. That really would have ruined my night.
The Rockstar Pro World Championship was on the line in a Triple Threat contest between challengers “Space Beast” Shigehiro Irie and “The Notorious 187” Homicide and the defending Rockstar Pro World Champion “The Fresh Prince of Midair” Trey Miguel. This would be Miguel’s greatest challenge yet defending against two worthy opponents at the same time. Fortunately for Trey, he decided to play it smart. After the initial action commenced and Irie pounced Miguel hard enough to send him over the guardrail and into the Rockstar Nation, Trey allowed Homicide and Irie to focus their aggressions on one another. When Homicide hit Shigehiro with a Ace Crusher, Trey made his move. He slid into the ring, pushed Homicide out, and covered Irie for the pinfall victory! Trey Miguel remains your Rockstar Pro World Champion! And who knows? He may indeed be a gangsta forever.
Our main event was an Island of Death Match between Team Rockstar and Team H2O in which the losing team’s captain would retire from wrestling at Rockstar Pro forever. Team Rockstar consisted of Eric Ryan, Ganger (who was competing in his final match at Rockstar), and team captain Mikael. Meanwhile, Stockade, G-Raver and team captain “Father” Matt Tremont made up Team H2O. This match was every bit the bloody confrontation one would expect when the most hardcore wrestlers at Rockstar collided with H2O! Multiple boards covered with barbed wire or carpet tacks were employed. Flesh was shredded with a cheese grater. It was a battle for the ages that concluded when Tremont hurled Mikael through a barbed wire-covered board to get the pinfall. It may have been both Ganger and Mikael’s last match inside a Rockstar Pro ring, but the crowd did not leave disappointed.
That just about wraps it up! Trey Miguel remains at the head of the pack as Rockstar Pro World Champion, and both Ganger and Mikael are retired from in-ring action at Rockstar. What will happen soon with the Rockstar Pro Trios Championships on the line? See us in-person or subscribe to Rockstarpronetwork.com to find out! Until next time, I remain your Rockstar Pro color commentator and the Voice of Professional Wrestling.